The one major theme they all relayed to me is that the women they messed around with some 15 years ago are now mostly married with kids—yet not a single one married a Black man.My boy summed it up the best when he said, “Man, we were all just a phase bruh.” Look, I’m aware that some people simply have preferences.Some people date within their own race because it’s just who they’re attracted to, while other people freely date people of any race because that’s what they are attracted to.But when we start talking about Black people who are reluctant or disinterested in interracial dating, or the ones who say, “I’ll date someone of another race, but I’m marrying someone Black,” we need to start looking deeper at the psychology behind it.They’re masters of being patient and waiting for the right time, which ultimately yields the best results.
Maybe this stems from living in a small town with a small but noticeable skinhead presence.Initially, it was jarring as hell for me because growing up in the town that we lived in, I had become accustomed to hanging out with suburban White girls who looked like cast members on Full House, while being romantically interested in Black girls.When we approached the scene, my boys dived in head first and completely lost themselves in the non-stop admiration they received from these White girls. Not only was I disinterested in courting their attention (which there was a surplus of for any Black boy), but there was a deep reticence I had for the entire scene that I simply could not put my finger on at the time.For a people with an incredibly complicated relationship with their nation and all it’s convoluted racial dynamics, it’s not as simple as preference. Lincoln Anthony Blades blogs daily on his site, This Is Your
He’s author of the book, “You’re Not A Victim, You’re A Volunteer.” He can be reached on Twitter @lincolnablades and on Facebook at Lincoln Anthony Blades.
Besides the fact that Black women are absolute magic, the Black politics of being anti-interracial dating are also predicated in emotional, mental, spiritual, and even physical preservation—the management of potential harm that you can be exposed to from clandestine prejudice from your significant other or even their family members. While it may seem like these concerns should weigh no heavier on a person of one race versus someone else, that’s not real life where White supremacy exists and White people devote themselves to upholding its solidarity.